The Search for the Golden Ducky
by Madori-Chan
Summary: 1724.3 years ago, a monsterous beast was defeated. Now it's back for revenge! Can the Dragon Knights find the Golden Ducky before it's too late?
1. Prologue

Ya know, when I got this idea, I was in the shower. It's weird, showers are like… my muse…

****

Disclaimer – You want a disclaimer? YOU CAN'T HANDLE A DISCLAIMER! *Gets thwacked over the head* Okay, okay, I don't own Dragon Knights. That's probably for the best. *mumble mumble*

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Prologue:

1,724.3 years ago, when the world was not-so-young but the Dragon Lord Lykouleon was younger than he is today, the universe was in great peril.

*A stick is held out from the side, with all of the little planets and the sun dangling from strings attached to it. *

A great monster had been reborn, and was seeking revenge for his imprisonment!

*Bad clips from the really old 'Godzilla' movie are played. *

The one thing that could defeat it was gold! With the help of the Dragon Clan, the monster was defeated!

*A picture of feet is shown. *

Not de-feeted, defeated!

*The feet are taken away and a picture that looks like a three-year old drew it replaces it. It is a picture of the monster with x's for eyes. *

Everyone rejoiced.

Everyone – (In really bored voices) Yay…

But, years later, the monster returned!

*A picture of Dusis with a monster foot poised over it*

Unfortunately, this time, due to circumstances in the world, there was no gold to be found! What were they to do? They tried franticly to find what they could, but it blew up in their faces.

*A filmstrip of miners working in a mine. A stick of dynamite blows up and causes a cave-in. *

Yet, there was hope! There was one chance left! And that one chance was… The Golden Rubber Ducky!

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Rath – Wow, it's only the prologue and it's already weird…

Thatz – Gold! I'm going to be in a fic about gold! Wonderful gold!

Madori – Oh, do shut up. It's not like you own all of the gold in the world or something! Which gives me an idea… hmm…

Rune – Just great. See what you made her do, Thatz? You made Madori get an idea!

Madori – Anyway, I think I'll keep you all in suspense! What can you expect in the next chapters? Sore wa… himitsu desu!


	2. The Beginning After the beginning

All right! I updated! Keep your head on, Queeny! *Watches as Queeny's head pops off* Oops! Hehe, a little too late. Oh well, nothing a little duct tape can't handle.

Disclaimer – I do not own Dragon Knights. I do, however, own my very own box of pocky! *munch munch*

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Quest! They have to get WHAT?!

It was a peaceful day in the Dragon Castle (yes, despite the fact that there was a large, almost indestructible monster raging outside). Lykouleon, the Dragon Officers and the Dragon Knights were calmly having a meeting. Well, maybe calmly isn't quite the word.

Rath - *Running around the room* Big demon! Big demon! 

Rune – Rath, you do realize that you could own every weapon in the world, have all of five of the dragons fight for you, be the most powerful knight that ever lived and none of it would matter if you didn't know how to kill this thing, right?

Rath - …So?

Mass facefaulting. 

Alfeegi – Now, if we could get back to the subject at hand… We need to do something! If this doesn't stop soon, the whole of Dusis may be destroyed!

Ruwalk – Is there any possible way we can defeat it?

Lykouleon – Interesting. It says here that the only thing that the monster can't stand is gold.

Alfeegi – Your Highness, what are you reading?

Lykouleon – Hmm? Oh, this. I found it lying around. *Holds up a piece of paper containing a copy of the prologue*

Alfeegi – Ah.

Ruwalk – Very intellectual.

A large tremor shook the room. Objects rattled, people lost their balance, and bobble head dolls bobbled until they could bobble no more.

Tetheus – This is very serious. The security cannot handle this sort of situation.

Rath – Leave it to Tetheus to be uptight in a humor fic. 

Tetheus – This is not a laughing matter.

Rath – Relax. All we have to do is get some gold.

Kaistern – That's the problem. Now that I look back on it, I don't recall seeing a single piece of gold in any of the places I've been recently.

Rune – Oh, that's because Thatz's obsession with valuables went overboard again. *points over his shoulder at Thatz, who is protectively standing in front of what looks to be all of the gold in the world*

Thatz – It's mine! All mine!!! (Insert maniacal laughter here)

Alfeegi - *Sweatdropping* He has the look of a wild dog protecting his territory…

Ruwalk – Looks more like a wild hyena to me. I don't think wild dogs are usually that cynical.

Alfeegi – Owned or not, we've got to use it. Now Thatz, if you would move aside… hey!

Everyone sweatdropped as they watched Alfeegi wrestle on the ground with Thatz, who had his teeth clamped tight onto Alfeegi's arm like a rabid animal and wasn't letting go.

Rune – I don't think he's going to share.

Ruwalk – Woah Thatz! Down boy!

Thatz was pried off of the semi-dead White Dragon Officer and placed in a strait jacket (which he promptly gnawed his way out of, but he was calmer.)

Alfeegi – Gah. *gets up*

Rath – Are you okay, Alfeegi?

Alfeegi – I'm fine.

Rath – You sure? You don't need rabies shots or anything, do you?

Alfeegi – I'M FINE!

Thatz – Besides, I don't have rabies! … I think.

Alfeegi – Er, maybe I _should_ get those shots…

Tetheus – So we are just going to sit here and wait for impending doom, I presume?

Lykouleon – Of course not.

Ruwalk – His Majesty has a plan?

Lykouleon – Have you forgotten about the Golden Ducky?

Kaistern – Of course! The Golden Ducky of Mt. Ripoff!

Rune – Kind of… Ironic, isn't it?

Kaistern – But Mt. Ripoff is pretty far away, not to mention all of the demons running around lately. To get there, we would need someone-

Rath - *Ears perk up at the word 'demon'* Demons? Why didn't you say so? If there's anyone who-

Thatz – Forget about the demons! It's gold, Rath! Gold!

Rune – _I'm surrounded by lunatics._

Thatz - *To Lykouleon* Have no fear, sir! If anyone can get that Ducky, It'll be me- I mean us! Come on Rune, Rath! *grabs the other two knights and runs out the door, leaving behind a large dust cloud*

Everyone -…

Lykouleon – _5…4…3…2…1…_

*Thatz runs in*

Thatz – Does anyone know how to get to Mt. Ripoff?

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Will the Dragon Knights be successful in their journey? What is the fate of Dusis? Will bobble head dolls ever bobble again? Stay tuned to find out! Remember, the Golden Ducky appreciates those who honor it!

(I do apologize for the shortness of the chapter. Hopefully the others will be longer, but as I said, I have little time to write.)


	3. The Chapter Without A Title

Madori - No, your eyes do not deceive you. I have actually updated! Celebrate!  
  
*Trumpets sound. Banners unfold. Confetti litters the air. Really really loud 80's music fills the air. *  
  
Thatz - Par-tay!  
  
Rune - Is this really the time to be celebrating? It's only the second chapter.  
  
Madori - What?  
  
Rune - *Shouting* I said, It's only the second chapter!  
  
Madori - *Straining to hear over the music* What's that? You want your own pet chicken raptor?  
  
Rune - *Sighs* Never mind.  
  
Disclaimer - Old Chinese proverb say man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind car get exhausted. What this have to do with disclaimer? Absolutely nothing.  
  
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Chapter 2: The Chapter Without a Title  
  
Miner's Town - A rich, prosperous settlement of. miners. Disregarding their famous food, the name alone was enough to bring our gluttonous, money grubbing Dragon Knight of Earth to his knees. That is, it would have, if the trio wasn't completely oblivious to its existence. Even so, that's where they were headed, if not exactly aware of it. Why are they going there, you ask? Would it really be Dragon Knights without any detours?  
  
Rath - Hark! *leans to one side with his hand by his ear*  
  
Rune - What now?  
  
Rath: My demon senses are tingling!  
  
Rune - What, again? This is the fifth time! And we've only been on the road for negative five minutes! Wait... when did that become possible?  
  
Thatz - Must you ask?  
  
Rune - Never mind. I think I already know.  
  
Madori - ^-^  
  
Rune - Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that we should go straight to Mt. Ripoff and then we can-  
  
He stopped as he realized that the two had run off and that he was now talking to the pigeons that had replaced them. The pigeons just kinda gave him that weird pigeony-ish look.  
  
Rune - *Sigh* Why me? Hey, wait up!  
  
~`~  
  
Rath - Deeemons! Demons, come out and plaaaaay!  
  
Silence.  
  
Rath - Hello, demons! Anyone there?  
  
More silence.  
  
Rath - Come on, you stupid demons! Get out here!  
  
The wind blows. Leaves flutter by. Animal noises are heard in the background.  
  
Rath - It's... not... fair! *Goes into a fetal position against the side of a building*  
  
Rune - You brought us miles off track for this?  
  
Thatz - It looks like a ghost town.  
  
Rath - A ghost town? You mean there are ghosts around? Woohoo! *Runs around the town looking for the ghosts*  
  
Rune - He really is irrepressible, isn't he?  
  
Thatz - *Sees something twinkling out of the corner of h is eye* A ruby! *Dives for the ruby, only to be stopped by a demon that the Authoress put there just because she felt like it* Hey! Gimme back my ruby! *Takes out his sword and starts hitting the demon over the head*  
  
Rath - Demon! *Jump-kicks Thatz aside and doesn't bother to take out his sword, but instead starts beating the demon with the heaviest thing he could lift*  
  
Rune - Uh... guys?  
  
Rath - DIE!  
  
Thatz - My ruby!  
  
Rune - Guys? Hello...  
  
Rath - Demons are not allowed to live!  
  
Thatz - Yakisoba!  
  
Rune - GUYS!!  
  
Rath&Thatz - WHAT?  
  
Rune - It's dead.  
  
Rath&Thatz - *look at the demon* oh.  
  
Thatz - Well that showed it. Stealing from other people is wrong! ...What, why are you staring at me like that for?  
  
Voice - You killed the great beast that terrorized our town?  
  
Rath - Hark, It's a disembodied voice!  
  
Voice - I'm not disembodied, I'm just off-screen!  
  
An old man stood near a house. This was not just any old man. This was an extremely unimportant old man.  
  
Rath - Aw, so I guess this means that you're not a ghost?  
  
Old man - No, I'm not!  
  
Rath - Darn.  
  
Rune - So this demon was terrorizing your town?  
  
Old man - No, that was only the demon that was working for the demon that was terrorizing the town.  
  
Thatz - But you said it was the demon terrorizing the town.  
  
Old man - No I didn't.  
  
Thatz - Yes you did.  
  
Old man - Where?  
  
Thatz - About thirteen lines up.  
  
Old man - No, I said the great beast was terrorizing OUR town. You said the demon was terrorizing YOUR town. There's a difference.  
  
Thatz - I didn't say that, Rune said that.  
  
Rune - Don't drag ME into this!  
  
Rath - So there's another demon? I'll gladly take care of it if you direct us to it.  
  
Old man - Perhaps... No. No, it is not yet time for me to reveal its name to you. Not even the bravest men have faced it unafraid.  
  
Rath - Pish-posh. I can handle any demon. Just tell me what it is!  
  
Old man - If you insist. It is...  
  
Rath - Uh-huh.  
  
Old man - It is...  
  
Rath - Tell me!  
  
Old man - It is...  
  
Rath - *Growls*  
  
Old man - The physical manifestation of Madori's obsession with manga!  
  
Rune - No! *Dramatic music*  
  
Old man - Yes! *Dramatic music*  
  
Rath - Ha! You think this is something that I can't take care of? *Dramatic music*  
  
Rune - Enough of the dramatic music already! *Dramatic music*  
  
Rune - *Ehem.*  
  
Conductor - Sorry.  
  
Old man - If you are still going to attempt to slay it, we will be gratefully in your debt.  
  
Thatz's mind - Destroy = Reward = Riches = RICHES!  
  
Thatz - Well, you know what they say, haste means waste!  
  
Rune - Oho, and you know what that phrase means?  
  
Thatz - Sure. It means that when you're in a hurry, your waist gets bigger, no?  
  
Rune - ...There should be a law against being that dense.  
  
Rath - There is. *Points to a couple of cop cars that are driving toward them*  
  
Officer - Thatz Whatever-your-last-name-is, I hereby arrest you on account of stupidity.  
  
Thatz - Noooooooo!  
  
*Cop car drives away*  
  
Rune - Well, that's Thatz.  
  
Rath - Yep. Now let's go get the demon!  
  
~`~  
  
Alfeegi - Now you're sure this is going to work?  
  
Ruwalk - Trust me. It'll be so obvious that they'll KNOW it was lame attempt from us to try to get them moving again.  
  
~`~  
  
PmoMowm - Anime!  
  
Rune - Ah! The Physical Manifestation of Madori's Obsession with Manga is huge! Do you have a plan of attack?  
  
Rath - Why yes. Yes I do. All we need do is... cut off Madori's income! *Dramatic music*  
  
Rune - *Glares*  
  
Conductor - Eep! *Hides*  
  
Rune - Cut off her income? How are you going to do that?  
  
Rath - Like this! *Whips out a cell phone* Hello, Mrs. Siever? Madori can't babysit for you anymore. Yeah, something about stress level. Apparently if it gets too high she goes berserk and starts running around with electric cattle prods. Okay, thanks. Bye! *Hangs up*  
  
Madori - *From a distance* Noooo!  
  
PmoMowm - Animeeeee! *disappears*  
  
Rune - Going berserk and running around with electric cattle prods? I always thought that was normal Madori behavior.  
  
Rath - It is, but it makes for a suitable excuse. Let's go back to the town, shall we?  
  
They headed back to town. When they got there, there seemed to be an uproar in the process.  
  
Rune - I wonder what's going on here?  
  
Random guy #1 - But one of 'em is in jail and the other two are right there! There can't be six of 'em!  
  
Random guy #2 - one group of them must be imposters! *Dramatic music*  
  
Rune - *Shoots the conductor*  
  
Conductor - *Dies*  
  
After a bit of investigating, they find out that the cause of the uproar is. another set of identical Dragon Knights?!  
  
Random guy #1 - But if they all look alike, how can we determine which group are the imposters?  
  
Elder - We shall ask them questions.  
  
Random guy #1 - Good idea, Elder!  
  
Elder - Of course it's a good idea!  
  
Rath - Don't worry, there's no way these imposters can win!  
  
Elder - Now then, we'll start with these two. First, what are your names?  
  
Rune - Rune.  
  
Rath - Rath.  
  
Elder - What is your quest?  
  
Rune - To serve the Dragon Lord Lykouleon and save Dusis.  
  
Rath - To kill things.  
  
Elder - What is your favorite color?  
  
Rune - Blue.  
  
Rath - Red.  
  
Elder - Now for the others. What are your names?  
  
Fake DK that looks like Thatz - Rath!  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rath - Rune!  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rune - Thatz!  
  
Elder - What is your quest?  
  
Fake DK that looks like Thatz - Hunting demons!  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rath - To do my best for the fate of the world!  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rune - To become the richest person who ever lived!  
  
Elder - What is the average airspeed velocity of an un-laden swallow?  
  
Fake DK that looks like Thatz - 10 flaps per second?  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rath - 62 beats per minute, obviously.  
  
Fake DK that looks like Rune - Uh... "H"?  
  
Elder - Enough! I have discovered the imposters!  
  
Rath - Isn't it obvious?  
  
Elder - Yes. The imposters are... them! Guards, take them away!  
  
~`~  
  
CLANG!  
  
Rune - ...What just happened here?  
  
Rath - It appears that we've gotten arrested for imitating ourselves.  
  
Thatz - Hiya guys!  
  
Rune - *Slaps his forehead*  
  
~`~  
  
Alfeegi - It'll be obvious, eh?  
  
Ruwalk - Hey, was it my fault that they played their roles a little too convincingly?  
  
Alfeegi - .Time out for you!  
  
Ruwalk - Noooooo!  
  
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Madori - Ya-ha! Did I have fun writing that!  
  
Rath - Don't you think it was a little... overdone?  
  
Madori - Not really. Oh! If you noticed the line from Lunar: The Silver Star Story that I snuck in here, good for you! I also snuck in some lines from Monty Python and the Holy Grail in here, but those were a little more obvious. And since I have run out of things to say, I will just end this chapter here. Jaa Ne! 


	4. Time Outs and Cellmates

Madori - And here's chapter three for y'all!  
  
Rath - It's kinda short... Shouldn't it be more of an interlude?  
  
Madori - ... Shut up -_-;;  
  
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Chapter 3 - Time-outs and Cellmates  
  
Recap!  
  
The Dragon Knights had been 'sent' on a special mission to stop the 1,724.3 - year - old monster from destroying Dusis. On their way, they stopped at a village plagued by a demon, which Rath promptly defeated. However, upon defeating the beast, our heroes (sans Thatz, who had been thrown into jail earlier) were imprisoned for 'impersonating' themselves, which was largely Ruwalk's fault.  
  
In a special little corner of the Dragon Castle...  
  
Ruwalk - Why me, why me, why me?  
  
Alfeegi - *From the doorway* It's your own fault, you know.  
  
Annoying brat #1 - Hey, look! A grown-up is in time out!  
  
Annoying brat #2 - Let's go play with him!  
  
Annoying brat #3 - Yeah!  
  
Ruwalk - Ow! Ow! Ow! Stop pulling my hair!  
  
Annoying brat #2 - Aw, he's no fun.  
  
Annoying brat #1 - ... Doggy pile!  
  
Ruwalk - Ack! Nooooo! *Drowned out by a series of noises that suggest that a doggy pile is taking place*  
  
~`~  
  
Thatz - No, please! Don't take them away! We've been together for such a long time! I can't do anything without them! Please don't leave me all alone, I'm begging you!  
  
Guard - Sorry, no eating in the cell.  
  
Thatz - But those are MY candy bars! I've had them since we left Dragoon! Can't I keep just one?  
  
Guard - Ok, okay. Snickers or Milky Way?  
  
Thatz - Snickers.  
  
Guard - Here ya go.  
  
Thatz - Yay!  
  
Rath - Milky Way is better.  
  
Thatz - Is not.  
  
Rune - Aren't they melted by now anyway?  
  
Thatz - No, they're pleasantly creamy.  
  
Rune - This is bad. You and Rath take us on an unnecessary detour to this town, we get jailed for losing an impersonation contest to imposters of ourselves, and to top it off, the only source of entertainment in this cell is a television set that plays only kid shows! God help the poor souls who actually watch that stuff.  
  
Rath - *Sitting cross-legged and wide-eyed in front of the television* I see. So "A" is for apple.  
  
Rune - *Sweatdropping* ... Can I take that back or is it already too late?  
  
~`~  
  
Meanwhile, in a DIFFERENT part of the Castle, there was plotting afoot. Lykouleon paced in his room, thinking.  
  
Lykouleon - With Ruwalk nowhere to be found, getting out of the castle is going to be more difficult than usual. However, this plan might work! Then again, I only thought it over for two minutes so... maybe not. Either way, I need supplies!  
  
Going over to his bed, he pushed a secret button. A door opened. After going through password, voice, handprint, and eye identification, another door opened, revealing a room filled with escape tools of every description.  
  
Lykouleon - Large suspicious looking bag, check! Stealth Suit - thank you Metal Gear Solid - Check! Looks like I've got everything I need. Let's go!  
  
*Enter Mission: Impossible music* Dun, dun, dun dun, dun, dun, dun dun dun!  
  
Lykouleon - *Shuffle shuffle shuffle*  
  
Random Dragon Fighter - *Walks up* Hello, Lord Lykouleon! You're looking very unsuspicious today. *Walks away*  
  
Lykouleon - ... *Looks down at the stealth suit* Aw, but the guy at the dealership said the suit really worked... guess I'll just have to wing it. *Shuffle shuffle shuffle*  
  
~`~  
  
Rath - *singing* I love you! You love me! We're a happy family!  
  
Thatz - ... I'm hungry.  
  
Rune - Idiots surround me. *Starts banging his head against the wall*  
  
Thatz - Hmm... Hey, Earth! Can you do me a favor?  
  
Five minutes later...  
  
Rath - "B" is for birdie. We shall find out what "C" is for momentarily!  
  
Rune - *Bang, bang, bang*  
  
Thatz - No, Earth! That's not what I wanted! Put it back and try again!  
  
Another elapsed time period later...  
  
Rath - *Singing* Let's all go to Sesame Street!  
  
Rune - Stop that! Do you have any idea how annoying that is?  
  
Rath - Nope.  
  
Thatz - *Munch, munch*  
  
Rune - Huh? Thatz, how'd you get your candy back?  
  
Thatz - This? I had Earth go find it for me. Except the first time he came back he brought what appeared to be a set of keys of some sort, so I told him to go back and get the right thing.  
  
Rune - YOU IDIOT!  
  
Thatz - What, were those keys important? Now that I think about it, I should have kept them. They might have been keys to a really big treasure chest or something. Dang it!  
  
Rune - *Starts hitting his head on the wall really hard*  
  
Rath - *Looks over* Hey! That looks like fun! *Imitates Rune*  
  
Crack crack crack crack CRACKCRACKCRACKCRACKCRACKCRACKSHATTER  
  
The Dragon Knights looked at the rubble of what had only moments ago been a sturdy stone wall.  
  
Rune - Freedom!  
  
Rath - Freedom? Where?  
  
Rune - We're free to go!  
  
Rath - Huh? When?  
  
Rune - The gap. In the wall. Right in front of you. See?  
  
Rath - C? No, I only got to B. Which is for birdie by the way.  
  
Rune - ... *Sigh*  
  
~`~  
  
Lykouleon - *Shuffle shuffle shuffle* Almost there. Ah! The door! Only one small dash to freedom!  
  
Alfeegi - *Waiting at the entrance* Hello Lykouleon.  
  
Lykouleon - *Skids to a stop* Drat! Trapped like a rat! Time for the bag of disguises! *Rumages through the bag*  
  
Alfeegi - ... What are you doing?  
  
Lykouleon - *Now wearing one of those masks with the big eyes and nose and mustache* Ehem. *Attempting to imitate a German accent* Hello. My name is Mr. Schnootenheimer, yah. I am definitely in no way, shape, or form the Dragon Lord trying to sneak out of the castle, yah. So just ignore me, pretend like I was never here, yah.  
  
Alfeegi - ...  
  
~`~  
  
Alfeegi - And stay in there!  
  
Lykouleon - But how did you see through my Mr. Schnootenheimer disguise?  
  
Alfeegi - The mission impossible music gave you away.  
  
Ruwalk - Oh God! It burns! Get them off! My back can't support the weight!  
  
Lykouleon - Ruwalk?  
  
Ruwalk - ... Lykouleon?  
  
Annoying brats - Yay! A new adult to play with!  
  
Ruwalk - Be afraid, Lykouleon. Be very afraid.  
  
Alfeegi - It's your own fault, you know.  
  
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Madori - You know what? This is kind of fun! I might do an experiment to see how many people I can fit in time out by the time this fic ends!  
  
Dragon Clan Members - Oh, joy.  
  
Thatz - You might have a hard time coming up with something to get Tetheus in trouble.  
  
Madori - I'll think of something. I'll also be sending you Dragon Knights a visitor in the next chapter. Gotta keep up to date with the books, you know.  
  
Dragon Knights - Oh, joy.  
  
Madori - Right. Review please! *Waves* Buh-bye! 


	5. The Drink of Happy

Madori - W00T! New Chapter! Sorry it always takes me so long. You know how some people constantly have inspiration and occasionally get writers block? Well, it's the complete opposite of me. I constantly have writers block and occasionally get inspiration. Thank God for Role Playing ^o^  
  
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In short, the Dragon Knights succeeded from escaping their captors...  
  
Rune - My head hurts.  
  
And went once again on their way to Mt. Ripoff. Unfortunately, Thatz's 'counterpart' had tagged along and was doing a remarkably good job of acting exactly the same (which, of course, meant he was stuffing his face). A plan was made.  
  
Rath - What are your names?  
  
'Thatz' – I'm Thatz.  
  
Thatz – I'm hungry.  
  
Rune – That's him.  
  
So now our heroes are... in the middle of nowhere. Again.  
  
Rune – We're lost, aren't we?  
  
Thatz – We're not lost, we just don't know where we are.  
  
Rath – You DID get directions, right?  
  
Thatz – Well yeah, but... oops... heheh...  
  
Rune – What did you do this time?  
  
Thatz – Well, you know... it's like, from Lykouleon's perspective, right is right and left is left, and from my perspective, it's opposite.  
  
Rath – How's that?  
  
Thatz – We were facing each other when he was telling me where to go.  
  
Rune - *Facefault* So in other words, we're going in the exact opposite direction that we're supposed to be going and if you weren't so thickheaded we'd be there by now.  
  
Thatz – Exactly.  
  
BAMF! (Madori's all-powerful summoning sound effect)  
  
Gil - ...Huh?  
  
Rath – What the--! Gil? What are you doing here?!  
  
Gil – Well I AM the rightful Fire Dragon Knight, you know. *glares at Rath*  
  
Rath – But... but... I KILLED you! This isn't fair!  
  
Gil – All's fair in love, war, and fanfictions.  
  
Rath – But you don't even have any creatures to use in battle! In what way are you a knight?  
  
Gil – Well, since you stole Fire, I'm using Madori's miniature blue penguin, Chincho.  
  
Chincho - *From Gil's shoulder* Cheep!  
  
Gil – Yes! P|-|34R ME, FOR I AM THE BLUE PENGUIN KNIGHT!  
  
Chincho – Cheep!  
  
Rath - ...Right. (This guy scares me.)  
  
Thatz – Gil speaks leet?  
  
~`~  
  
Kaistern - *pacing the hallways* Why is it always like this? I leave in three hours and I don't have nearly enough money for the trip. In fact... *looks at the 500 yen in his hand* It's more like an allowance than anything.  
  
He stopped.  
  
Kaistern – Why is it so quiet today? I can't even hear Alfeegi and Ruwalk arguing like usual. Wait a minute...  
  
-Begin Thought Process-  
  
Alfeegi + Ruwalk + Not Arguing = Quiet Castle  
  
Alfeegi + Ruwalk + Not Arguing = Alfeegi + Ruwalk + Not Here  
  
Quiet Castle = Alfeegi + Not Here  
  
-End Thought Process-  
  
Kaistern - *Evil Smile*  
  
~`~  
  
Thatz – C'mon bartend! Keep it comin'!  
  
Rune – I thought we were backtracking. I don't remember visiting The Pink Elephant tavern!  
  
Thatz – Ah, lighten up Rune! The Lord sent us on this mission to find treasure, right? Food and alcohol are the best treasures you can find! Have a drink?  
  
Rune – Isn't drinking habit forming?  
  
Thatz – Of course not! I've been drinking every day since I was ten, and I haven't forned a habit! Besides, think of all the things you have to put up with.  
  
Rath - *Drunk and delusional, but not angsty* Look! Demon! *Runs after the imaginary demon and smacks into the wall*  
  
Rune - ...Gimme that. *Downs the beer*  
  
Later...  
  
Thatz – An' then *hic* Alfeeshi said that I woulsh hafta pay fer it all by myshelf. Ahahahahahaha! *Smacks the table with his free hand while drinking more with the other*  
  
Rune – Yeah, that shoundsh like ol' Feeshi all right.  
  
Rath – How dry I am *hic* How dry I aaaaaamm. Hey, I know! Letsh... shing! *jumps up on the table and starts singing* You can dansh, you can jive, you can have the time of your liiiiiiiife!  
  
Thatz - *Also jumps onto the table* Shee that girl, shee her dance, you are the danshing queen! *pours beer on innocent bystanders while attempting to dance*  
  
Chincho - *Totters past Gil, who has just entered the room* Sheeeep...  
  
Gil – What? Chincho... are you drunk?  
  
Chincho – Sheep.  
  
Gil - *Notices the commotion* HEY! What did I tell you about dancing intoxicated on unsturdy tables while singing songs that have absolutely nothing to do with the plotline?  
  
Thatz – Uh... Include you?  
  
Gil – That's right! Come, Chincho! *Chugs a keg and leaps onto the table with a microphone* Sho young'n swheet, only shev'nteen!  
  
Chincho – Sheeeep!  
  
Rune – Ehh... lalla la... *Tries to remember the rest of the lyrics* Ah, what the hay... *sings* The besht thing about 'a bein' a woman, ish the peroga- thingy ta have a little fun!  
  
Everyone – Oh woah oh woah! Man! I feel like a woman! Dun dun duh dun dun dun duh!  
  
~`~  
  
Kaistern - *standing in front of the vault with a blowtorch and a wielding mask* Okay, the beeping noise stopped, so I guess the sensor thingy is disabled. *Takes off the mask and sighs* I really don't want to do this, but the money I got won't even cover traveling expenses. Besides, nothing's illegal if you don't get caught, right?  
  
A code was input and the door opened.  
  
Kaistern – Woohoo! I did it!  
  
Obviously, Kaistern has the eyes of a hawk, the ears of a wolf, the swiftness of a rabbit, the cunning of a fox-  
  
Alfeegi – Hello.  
  
-And the intuition of a brick.  
  
Kaistern - *Turns around and covers his eyes*  
  
Alfeegi – Kaistern... what are you doing?  
  
Kaistern – But... but... if I can't see you, you can't see me either, right? How'd you-?  
  
Alfeegi – You forgot to take off the nametag that you were supposed to wear to the meeting in Chantel. *Points to a nametag that has "Hi! My name is Kaistern!" written in sharpie*  
  
Kaistern – Curse the sharpie and it's inability to lie.  
  
Alfeegi – The sharpie is not at fault. Do not blame the sharpie.  
  
~`~  
  
Ruwalk – Got any... One Winged Angels?  
  
Lykouleon – Go fish.  
  
Ruwalk – Sure is quiet.  
  
Lykouleon – For a change.  
  
Alfeegi - *Opens the door and throws Kaistern in* I don't know why you people insist on breaking the rules, but until you learn your lesson, you must be punished. And why are you playing Go Fish with Delte's fortune telling cards? *Yoinks the cards and leaves*  
  
Kaistern - *pounding on the door* Aah! Wait! I still have to go to Chantel!  
  
Lykouleon & Ruwalk – Shh! You'll wake up the—  
  
Annoying Brat #1 – New Playmate!  
  
Ruwalk - ...Too late.  
  
Lykouleon - *winces as the brats plow into Kaistern* Ouch.  
  
Kaistern – The agony...  
  
~`~  
  
Thatz, Rath, Gil, and Chincho stand in front of the remains of a tavern. Rune runs around in the background blowing up random things.  
  
Rath – So Thatz, what have we learned from this?  
  
Thatz – Never give Rune alcohol.  
  
Rath – Never again.  
  
Chincho – Shee *hic* eep.  
  
Thatz – Is he going to be all right? I don't think penguins are supposed to drink.  
  
Gil – He belongs to the authoress, so he's probably used to it. In fact, I'm surprised he hasn't built up an immunity.  
  
Rath – Uh-oh, here he comes again!  
  
Thatz – Ruuuuunn!  
  
~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`  
  
Madori – Hmm... *thinks* Eehh... *clears throat as if she was bout to make an announcement* Ahem! ... I can think of nothing to say!  
  
Crowd - *mumbles*  
  
Madori – Sorry folks, you can get your money back at the front gate. 


End file.
